09092009

Hey guys!

I know I haven't written here in a long time... things are still going well, though!  I guess it's just hard to think of things to write here when I'm already writing weekly for work.  I tried to create a feed for my stories that I could point you all to, but even though the URL works in Google reader, it doesn't work for LJ. :(

 

Here it is, though... in case you have a reader you want to add it to:   http://www.wflx.com/Global/category.asp?C=136000&clienttype=rss

I'm getting into a treacherous part of my weight loss... where it looks like I may actually get where I want to!  That's always where I screw up.  So, I may start to write here some more as some of my thinky stuff on that may be more suited to a small group of friends than my clients and co-workers. ;)

I just realized I haven't written here in a long time. Maybe starting again will be the trick to get through this plateau I'm stuck on. :P I've been pretty much gaining and losing the same 2-3 pounds for the last 6 weeks.

But, at the same time, I feel great and people (even people who've seen me constantly over those 6 weeks) keep telling me that I look smaller and smaller!

It's so weird... I was talking to a friend the other day and he said that, more than anything, he could definitely see a major change in my face. I look at myself in the mirror everyday, so I don't really see it. So I pulled out a picture from December and took a couple of new ones this past weekend... and it's so strange... honestly, I can look at the pictures one minute and think the change is barely noticeable and look again a minute later and think they look like two different people. It's amazing the tricks our brains play on us while we're struggling with these types of things.

For reference...


Me in December 2007


Me in November 2008


Me again in November 2008... I thought this one compared more point to point to the first picture, since the angle's more similar, though I'm smiling a little weirdly and sort of don't look like myself to me

I guess all the ups and downs and mind games aside, the only thing to do is just keep plugging away. I'm going to have some help with the plateau that's pretty cool that I'll tell you guys about soon. :)

1) For the first time in a *loooong* time I have less than 100 pounds to lose to get to my goal. I'm leaving some wiggle room to my *ultimate* goal which could be a few more than 100 away, but, I don't NEED to lose more than 100. Wow.

2) I've hit that point in my weight loss where I'm always cold. :P

3) I've actually exercised TWICE a day twice this week. I'm hardcore. ;)

4) Went to a class this morning that has been scaring me for weeks... and I survived! Not only that, but, I actually did a handfull of dumbbell rows from a 1-handed push up position. Go me!

5) I get another check from my brother for new clothes this week. :)

Week 27 this week: +1 lbs.
Change overall: -53.5 lbs.

Okay, I'll admit it, I haven't been weighing myself just twice a week like I had planned. And this is one of those weeks where I was a tiny bit tempted (but surprisingly, not that tempted) to use my weight from Wednesday as my "official" weigh-in instead of my weight from Tuesday. But what's really eye-opening for me is that, for maybe the first time, I truly was not concerned with the number on the scale.

I had a good week. I generally ate well and exercised a lot. I also had Mexican food at a going-away party on Friday, went to one of my favorite Italian restaurants for pasta on Saturday, and had all-you-can-eat sushi on Monday night. So seeing an increase on the scale Tuesday was completely expected and reasonable.

Even before things righted themselves a bit when I weighed myself this morning, I was okay with the gain. I'm finding that ever since I hit the 50 pound mark, I've been more successful at focusing on the "big picture." I just remind myself that the little blips and bumps along the way are to be expected and can't throw me off if I don't let them.

This did get me thinking, though. What if, worst case scenario, I don't lose another pound? I feel great. I look better than I did six months ago. I'm making healthy choices. But, how do I make sure that, no matter what, I don't go back to where I was?

Like I often do in these situations, I turned to one of my friends who has dealt successfully with what I'm facing. Laura's been giving me great advice for weeks and I knew she'd be the perfect person to talk to about maintaining weight loss.

She originally took four years to lose 125 pounds - and she kept it off for more than three years before losing another 25 pounds to hit her goal.

Everyone (well, everyone who's never struggled with it!) always says how weight loss is just a matter of calories burned being more than calories consumed. But there's so much more to consider. And for Laura, the biggest struggle with maintaining weight loss is going on in her head.

"Accomplishing something this drastic created an odd inner struggle for me," she explains. "At times I am 100% committed to keeping the weight off, but at other times I almost rebel against myself.

"I start to get upset and frustrated with the restrictions I've placed on myself, and I want to throw myself up against those boundaries in rebellion.

"So I suppose the hardest part of keeping the weight off is learning to speak to myself in a kind way, to understand those feelings and not judge the part of me that is, very simply, sick and tired of dieting."

Luckily, motivation is relatively easy to tap into. "I made it this far," Laura says. "I am NEVER going back!"

I asked her for five tips for keeping the weight off and she had some great suggestions:

1) Identify a red-alert weight
Weight fluctuates naturally, so I keep a "Red-Alert Weight" in mind. It's usually 10 lbs above my goal, and when I hit it, I start dieting in earnest again.

2) Remember that you've made a lifestyle change
Lifestyle changes don't stop being important once you reach your goal! I still focus on mine, like getting exercise and staying away from taboo foods

3) Keep tracking your status
Weigh yourself once a week. I know, it's a little evil, but it helps!

4) DON'T be overly restrictive with yourself
Allow yourself those delicious things you missed while dieting! I know this sounds counter-intuitive, but part of the joy of maintaining is getting an ice cream cone or some fries every once in a while. Just do it in moderation. My tip for enjoying these things healthily is always to get the kiddie size. You can also make yourself feel better about it by walking or riding a bike to the ice cream shop.

5) Be kind to yourself
Imagine you are your own boss. Your employee is finally performing at peak, so you don't want to keep micro-managing, you want to encourage that behavior and give more leeway and autonomy.

I've been a little remiss in posting here lately... I think at the very least I need to just post my new stories from work as I do them!

Things are going great! Tuesday marked 6 months to the day since I started Weight Watchers and I'm really happy with my progress. Also? Tried on two pairs of pants that were too tight on me a couple of months ago... and they literally fell off me. WOO!

Here's this week's article (if you want to follow the articles on one of our sites, tell me where you live and I'll give you a URL for somewhere close to you :))...

Week 26 Weigh In:

Change this week: -3.5 lbs.
Change overall: -54.5 lbs.

Yesterday was a big day for me - six months to the day since I signed up for Weight Watchers and really started focusing on exercise. And with all the ups and downs, my net loss so far is 54.5 pounds... a number that makes me incredibly happy!

My original goal was to lose 100 pounds by September 2009 - to celebrate my looming 40th birthday. When I realized that I could very realistically hit the 50-pound milestone by my birthday this year, I re-evaluated. Now I'm shooting for a total of 150 pounds by my 40th. Wow.

It's aggressive and a little scary, but, I know I can do it.

For me, as much as I have a love/hate relationship with the scale, pounds are the easiest measure to set goals, track my progress and keep myself motivated. For some other ideas, I talked to my weight loss idols, Danny and Laura, about their goals and milestones.

Like me, Danny's first goal was related to a date on the calendar. "The real impetus behind my initial weight loss was skydiving," he says. "I wanted to go skydiving for my 30th birthday and I had to lose 45 pounds in order to do it. Jumping out of that plane was a huge reward for me!"

Laura, who actually stayed off the scale for the first 60 pounds of her weight loss, subscribes to the SMART goal model when setting markers for herself. "SMART stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timely," she explains. "It helps to keep these things in mind when setting goals. For instance, ‘I'm going to look like a super model in six months!' is NOT an easily achievable goal. ‘I'm going to cut out fried foods for three weeks' is more likely to actually happen."

Both of my friends had a specific reward in common - clothes. And both tried to avoid a specific kind of reward - food.

Danny measured his success by clothing size. "I would go stretches where I wasn't seeing the numbers go down on the scale, but I was dropping clothes sizes," he says. Adding: "I found that shopping isn't traumatic, like it used to be, now that I can just go into a store and pick up something off the rack if I think it's cool.

"What I didn't do was set food goals, like if I lose 10 pounds, I can have some wings. I think one of the things I've learned most about losing weight is that it's a lifestyle change -- if I want a plate of wings, I'll have some wings. I'm not really depriving myself of anything -- I just wrap it into the larger context of whether or not it will help me meet my long-term goals."

Laura concurs. "It's so hard not to reward with food," she says. "But shopping, for me, was almost as good. My mom, who was so happy with my new healthy path, would often offer to take me shopping after I hit a new pound goal. Being able to fit in cute little clothes was a huge motivator for me."

Laura's help from her mom highlights something else I've been finding to be such an incredible part of my weight loss journey - support. I have such amazing support from my family and friends that I wish I could bottle it up and give it to people that I see struggling alone in their efforts!

One of the biggest differences in my approach to weight loss this time is that I've been very open about what I'm doing and have looked for support anywhere I can get it. In the past, I would keep quiet about my struggles and just mumble something about trying to be healthier when someone would ask me what was going on. Now, I have no qualms telling everyone what I'm trying to do and how I'm doing it.

And, from my brother who buys me new clothes as I drop weight... to my mom and her friends who read about my progress in this space and send me dozens of encouraging emails... to my friends who give me cards and shower me with compliments and work out with me and who know when to push food away from me and when to enjoy cheese fries with me... I'm finding support everywhere I go.

I know that not everyone is as lucky as I am in that regard. Laura actually told me about friends who were uncomfortable with her changing and would do things like buy fatty foods and make fun of her when she'd try to pass them up. "I'd caution people losing weight to evaluate early on who will be a real source of support," she says, "and stick close to them."

For people who are having trouble finding support, here are some ideas for places you may find like-minded folks to help you along the way:

1) If you're on a specific program like Weight Watchers or Jenny Craig or The Atkins Diet, check out their website for a community area which may have forums or bulletin boards. Lurk for a bit to feel it out and see if you'd be comfortable participating and then take a deep breath and say "hi!" There are also sites like ediets.com and sparkpeople.com that have all sorts of resources as well as lively community areas.

2) Look for an exercise buddy. If you've recently started going to the gym, you may find someone there with similar goals to yours. Try some classes and strike up conversation with someone who seems to be at about the same level of fitness you are.

3) Pay someone! If you can, consider working with a trainer - even if it's just every other week or once a month. I've found my trainers to be amazing sources of support, especially as I struggle with plateaus and rough spots. They're also great resources for the kind of advice that will get you through those spots.

This is so stupid. I've lost 49 pounds. Which is TOTALLY AWESOME! But I am so focused on hitting 50 that I think I'm sort of sabotaging myself.

I'm not sure if I've talked about it much here, but, I stopped drinking in February when I set out to lose weight. And then added in the incentive that I'd go drinking each time I hit a 25 pound milestone.

A couple of weeks ago, things were looking really good to hit 50 so I set tomorrow night as my next night to drink. And now I'm not there! I weigh myself an embarassingly high number of times a day... and I've been so obsessed with losing 50 pounds that I just can't trust my program to work... even though I know it does.

I know I can't starve myself. I know I have to eat all my points... especially when I'm exercising a lot. I know if I go over my daily points and into my flex points, it's OKAY... in fact, it's GOOD... every time I've done this in the past months I've LOST WEIGHT. But since I'm so stuck on these last couple of pounds for this milestone, I keep shaving off the points I'm eating, thinking, "Well, as soon as I hit 50, WHICH SHOULD BE NOW SINCE I'M BEING SO GOOD, I'll go back to a more reasonable state of mind and it'll all be okay." But the last couple of pounds just aren't coming off.

So, I think it's time to put my scale away and really try to limit myself to weighing myself once a week. I'm going to go ahead and say I'm close enough to 50 to drink tomorrow night. I originally figured I wouldn't if I wasn't there because I wouldn't enjoy it if I was "cheating" my plan... but, it's MY PLAN... and MY GOAL... and MY INCENTIVE... so of course I can bend it if I want.

And I'm going to go out on a limb and NOT weigh myself tomorrow morning. So I won't even know if I really hit the 50. And I won't weigh myself again until Tuesday morning. And then I'll go from there.

I went home to Baltimore to visit my dad this weekend and I was definitely excited to see his reaction to my weight loss... he hasn't seen me since I started Weight Watchers back in February, so, I was hoping he'd really notice a difference.

He said something right away... and said that the difference was *very* noticeable... in my face, my hips, even my shoulders. It was really nice to hear it... one of the weird things is how hard it is to see the difference in yourself!

When we got back to his house, he made a big deal out of saying to the girls (his girlfriend's 16 and 21 year olds) "doesn't Lisa look great since she's lost weight??" and the older girl was like, "Lisa *always* looks awesome!" And later she told me she thought I looked great but that I was beautiful inside anyway so she'd always thought I was beautiful. I thought that was very sweet.

Three more pounds until I go out drinking again! ;)

Here are links to my newest story with action photos! (Zoners will particularly chuckle at one of them. ;))

http://www.google.com/search?q=spodak+%22choosing+a+gym%22&hl=en&filter=0

Oy! So, I'm not sure what possessed me, but I tried a teensy bit of jogging Tuesday night. Just 4 separate spurts of 1 minute each at 4.5 miles an hour. Just -->this far<-- over the edge of walking really fast. But, still faster than I've done before and definitely go the heartrate up a bit! Not sure how much I'll end up doing it and I certainly won't be running any marathons any time soon, but, it *did* feel good to do it. And my trainer was impressed when I told him about it last night. :)

I'm in a bit of a situation... now my *old* trainer is back from out of town and wants to start training again. I just bought a package with the new trainer... really like them both, but, really can't afford both. Don't know what to do!! It's like juggling two freaking relationships. Oy.

I'm down 43 pounds this week! I've been really good about going to the gym, which rocks. Having a little trouble really sticking to my eating plan, but, nothing *horrendously* out of control. I'm getting a little worried about being out of town next week, though! The last time I was out of town, I was staying in a hotel with a gym. I'll be staying with friends in San Francisco, so I'm a little bit panicked about gym time. I know I can at least walk, but, that's just not the same. Not sure what to do.

Ha! I love that a friend at work just asked me, not if I'd lost more weight, but.. "Have you gone drinking again already??" Since he knows that I'm going drinking every 25 pounds I lose. :)

I'm down 40 pounds!! So excited!

I think I should pretty easily be down 50 by my birthday in September.. and I think I'll probably up my goal so that I'm shooting for another 75 by next year's birthday... crazy!

I've been trying to cook more at home and tried something new yesterday that came out *so* good... I bought some whole wheat rollup flatbread things that I figured I'd try to make pizza on... and it worked! Only 8 points and totally yummy! I was psyched. :) So easy too... just baked the rollup to get it a bit crispy... added tomato sauce, reduced fat mozzarella and some parmesan and baked it some more. Delish! And today Fresh Direct delivered some meatless pepperoni I'm going to try adding next time. :)

It's been pointed out to me that I haven't been writing as much here as I'd intended to... and I realized that part of the reason is that I've been writing weekly about my weight loss for work, so, it *feels* like I've been journaling!

Things are pretty good... had a little bit of a blip this week, gaining 1 pound. Which bugged me for a few minutes, but, then I got off my ass, went to the gym, and got back on track. 35.5 pounds so far!!!

Then I realized last night that I'd been to the gym 5 days in a row... which is definitely some sort of personal record for me. I'm skipping today, but, with hardly any thought, I walked to work today to sort of make up for it. And I'm definitely planning on the gym tomorrow, Saturday and Sunday... go me! :)

Monday night, in preparation for what I knew would be a gain Tuesday morning, I went through my closet trying on clothes to see if that would make me feel better... and the extra half a bag of stuff I cleaned out that's too big now was definitely a plus!

If you want to check out what I've been writing for work (there have been 5 "entries" so far) go here and take your pick of where to check it out. :)

I'm really, really pleased with things right now. :)

I tried to be "good" in Houston and most of my trip to Vegas.. and, some things were surprisingly difficult (eating well on the actual walk) and some things were surprisingly easy (I totally *beat* the buffets in Vegas!). And then, for one night in Vegas, I didn't even try... I embraced the idea of doing what I wanted for one night and having a delicious steak dinner and tastes of all the sides. The next morning I was right back on track. And when I got home, I was down 3.5 pounds. :)

I worked out in the fitness center 2 out of 3 days in Vegas, including the day right after the Walk when I was planning on taking a day off. And I drank lots of water.... snagging bottles from the spa whenever I could. :)

I'm down a total of 28 pounds now... in 9 weeks... I'm thrilled. :)

( weird little issue only for the girls )

Today was my first day *completely* out of my element since I started on WW in February... and it was both easier and harder than I thought it would be.

Breakfast was pretty easy... there's a Starbucks just about a block from where I'm staying, so, I had a chai latte and fruit cup. I also had a cheese snack back at my friend's place.

I was planning on getting lunch at the mall and figured I could find *something* not too bad... even if it was a slice of pizza. But, my friend wanted to get something quick before dropping me off and thought Quizno's would be fastest and easiest. It's funny... I go to a sandwich shop (Subway) EVERY day for lunch and felt so completely out of my element at a different one!

I ended up getting one of their new "sammies"... it was small.. and all the marketing seemed to be pushing people to get two... so, I figured it couldn't be *too* bad. But when I got back in front of my computer and checked the nutrition, it turned out to be 8 points! Yikes. Counted along with my Baked Lays, that left me just 13 points for dinner.

I ended up hitting a Mexican place around the corner... I was by myself, so, a little bit down... and ate *way* too many tortilla chips. Still counted them, though and did *not* finish off the basket. Did the best I could for my entree, ordering shrimp fajitas. Asked them to leave off the rice and to give me whole wheat tortillas. All told, though, I still managed to eat 23 points just at dinner. :(

As a rule, I don't dip into my weekly flex points... so, it's not like I blew the week. And, if I'm gonna eat a bit extra... the day before I walk for at least 5 hours is certainly the day to do it! Now I just have to make sure I don't go crazy at the rest stops on the walk tomorrow... :)

Well, if every 1.5 pound weight gain is going to be followed by a 6 pound loss, I'll never complain again! Of course, it won't be... but, it was nice this week. ;)

So, yeah... down 6 pounds this week for a total of 23.5 so far (7 weeks). And I swear, I didn't do anything drastic because of the gain last week... just stuck to the plan the way I've been doing it since the beginning.

Things continue to go well... had a potential complication with my exercise this week when I did something really funky to my neck, but, it seems to have worked itself out and I'm okay. Phew.

I *am* a little worried about the next week and a half, though... I'm not concerned about sticking to my plan (even though parts will be challenging as I'll have to give up some control and specificity while I'm in Houston and Vegas)... but, I'm scared to death about not weighing myself for a week. I know deep down that it's probably actually a really good thing, but, it's freaking me out a little.

Then, when I get back... we'll be heading into Passover. Which I'm planning on using as a way to perhaps wean myself off my bagel every morning... I'll give it up for the 8 days and then try to stick to having it just on Fridays. We'll see how that goes. ;)

My boss--who is being *incredibly* supportive about my efforts--managed to give me my least favorite compliment yesterday. :( He saw me and said that the weight is "melting away." I know I overthink things, but, that specific comment always bugs me a little because I think it implies that a) the weight loss is easy and b) it's due to some sort of outside effect. And the bottom line is that while it's going at a good rate, *every* pound is a struggle and I think about weight loss and work on the weight loss every hour of every day. I know he didn't mean anything less than complimentary by it, but, it just gets me a teensy bit. /stupid venting

He also said I looked gorgeous and healthy and glowing... and I certainly won't complain about that. ;)

I don't think I've been consciously avoiding salt, but, eating more healthfully must have that effect... I just had some miso soup and HOLY HELL... salty! I almost couldn't eat it... but, I wanted it and I did. ;) I don't know if it's an inordinately salty batch or just my tastebuds changing.. in any case... I'm gonna have to drink a *lot* of water this afternoon to flush that out!!

I went to see my new trainer at the new gym last night... and was really pleased! We did the whole filling-out-forms and answering-questions stuff and talked about where I am with my working out and my goals. I was wearing one of my 'Fred's Save Boobs' tshirts and he said he lives in the building where Fred's is, which was pretty funny.

He had said that last night would be an "easy" workout since a lot of the time would be talking, but, I was dripping sweat by the end! I'm a little worried about a "normal" workout! ;)

He is COMPLETELY different from my other trainer... seriously... COMPLETELY... in looks, body type, training style. And the exercises he puts together are pretty different, but, I can totally see where their philosophies and strategies are actually remarkably similar... so, I think going to the both of them will end up working out *really* well for me.

I'm excited!

I knew this would happen, but, I guess I didn't think it would happen *this* soon... gained 1.5 pounds this week. Bleh.

I've been doing everything "right" (including going to the gym regularly), so I'm going to just keep going forward and sticking to the plan. It happens.

A couple of things to pay attention to... I don't think I've been snacking as much as I did at the beginning, and maybe that's affecting things? And, relatedly, I've definitely had more days where I haven't eaten all my points... especially on days that I walk a lot or go to the gym. So, I'll focus on that a bit.

It's just funny... in the past when I've done WW, when I've had points left at the end of the day, I've used it as a license to eat snacks/desserts. Now, I find myself wanting something like vegetables... which doesn't eat up the points. I still don't want to be eating a lot of empty calories at the end of the day, so, I'll try to eat more during the day.

I knew this would happen... it's normal... I knew this would happen... it's normal...

Repeat as needed. ;)

As my boss said yesterday... I'm in this to win the war, not the battle.

Yep... lost another daily point. But, that's good... since it's a result of losing 4.5 pounds this week and 19 pounds overall. YAY! :)

I've noticed that I've become a very picky orderer. One of my weekly treats is a cheeseburger at Vlada after walking for a few hours. I figure that the day when I've got a bunch of extra activity points is the day to do it! (I definitely eat my activity points, though, I try not to eat my weekly points). So, as I often do, I spent the last hour or so of my walk Saturday thinking about *exactly* what I wanted to eat. Cheeseburger, yes. Bun, no. Fries, YES! Cheese fries, even more YES. So, I knew I was eating some "bad" stuff, but, I figured within that framework, I'd do the best I could and tweak things so I could stay within my daily points and on track.

So, I ordered the cheeseburger without the bun. And asked for cheese on my fries, but, asked them to only give me half of what they normally do. It was a *huge* number of points for lunch, but, I'd had shrimp for "breakfast" right before I walked and lunch was actually at 4:30... so, I just had some eggplant for dinner and ended up 1 point under my target for the day. :)

I got all Sally at brunch on Sunday, too. Poached eggs are my favorite... and, luckily, they're pretty much the best way you can prepare eggs. So, I had two poached eggs on whole wheat toast... tomato slices instead of potatoes... and a side of Canadian bacon. The plate looked a little funny without potatoes, but, I giggled a little because it was just EXACTLY all what I wanted. :)

I've made a new "drastic" decision... as soon as clothes get too big for me, they're OUT OF HERE. Not hanging on to anything. And, even more so, at the end of this season, I'm getting rid of all my winter clothes. I am fully expecting them to all be too big for me next year, so, they're going away NOW.

I'm on a rampage! ;)